These clown on both parties!!!
Q: Why did the war-happy Democrat cross the road?
A: Because his poll numbers told him to.
Q: Why did the chickenhawk Republican cross the road?
A: To get home so he could grease himself in machine gun lubricant and watch Fox News.
You might be a Republican if... you have Jesus on speed dial.
You might be a Republican if... you believe in equality, for everyone like you.
You might be a Democrat if... your basement doubles as a recreational abortion clinic.
You might be a Democrat if...you play hacky sack after condescending to a homeless person.
How many Republicans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two.
One to borrow a light bulb from China, and one to outsource the screwing to India.
How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?
501.
One to screw in the bulb, and 500 to protest the coal mine that generated the electricity.
AND MY FAV:
Santa Claus, Zorro, and a fiscally responsible Democrat are all walking together when they spot a $100 bill on the ground. Who gets it first?
None! Because they don't exist!
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