Difference between conservatives and liberals(humor)
If a conservative doesn`t like guns, he doesn`t buy one.
If a liberal doesn`t like guns, he wants all guns outlawed.
If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone.
If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy.
A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.
If a conservative is **********, he quietly leads his life.
If a liberal is **********, he demands legislated respect.
If a black man or Hispanic are conservative, they see themselves as independently successful.
Their liberal counterparts see themselves as victims in need of government protection.
If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks about how to better his situation.
A liberal wonders who is going to take care of him.
If a conservative doesn`t like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Liberals demand that those they don`t like be shut down.
If a conservative is a nonbeliever, he doesn`t go to church.
A liberal nonbeliever wants any mention of God and religion silenced.
(Unless it`s a foreign religion, of course!)
If a conservative decides he needs health care, he goes about shopping for
it, or may choose a job that provides it.
A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.
If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is embarrassed.
If a liberal slips and falls, he grabs his neck, moans like he`s in labor and then sues.
A conservative sees nuclear power as a great option for America
A Liberal sees nuclear power as a great option for EVERYONE but America
If a conservative reads this, he`ll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh.
A liberal will delete it because he`s "offended".
